On March 20th, 2005, at 4:00 P.M. EST (9:00 P.M. GMT), the XYZZY Awards Ceremony was held at ifMUD. Below is the transcript of the event, including side-comments that those in attendance made on the #peanut-gallery channel. Should you not wish to see those comments, an expurgated version is also available.

 

lpsmith says, "Next up: The Artist is here, to present the Best Individual PC award."
[peanut-gallery] DorianX says, "xyzzy. w. e."
TheArtist makes a run for the stage, but is roughly turned back by a pack of stern security guards.
[peanut-gallery] Kwi says, "Heehee."
Rob claps
[peanut-gallery] Bishop asks, "Who's supposed to be working the chalkboard?"
lpsmith exclaims (at guards), "He's allowed!"
TheArtist says, "hey"
[peanut-gallery] * Epsilon has joined the channel.
[peanut-gallery] Rob says, "fight! fight!"
[peanut-gallery] Fang says, "Surely the Artiste."
Paul says, "Yay artist"
vbnz runs on stage. Hah! I snuck past you!
TheArtist says, "I have a pass and everything."
Paul exclaims, "quote! quote!"
Hugo goes home.
</Hugo> Hugo has disconnected from ifMUD.
TheArtist says, "I have, of course, brought the book of quotations that my parents left with me at the orphanage."
[peanut-gallery] inky scribbles on chalkboard.
[peanut-gallery] Rob says, "man, that game seems like 2 years ago instead of just 1"
vbnz groans
TheArtist says, "I really can't imagine going anywhere without it."
TheArtist says, "I read that Oscar Wilde once said, 'It is only an auctioneer who can equally and impartially admire all schools of Art.'"
(From Jon) Fireworks go off outside, prematurely
TheArtist says, "So I am very honored to present the award for Best Individual Player Character."
Paul says, "Ha"
TheArtist says, "The five nominees are:"
TheArtist says, "Arthur Conan Doyle wrote, 'I consider that a man's brain originally is like a little empty attic, and you have to stock it with such furniture as you choose.' Our first nominee is Dante in Blue Chairs, by Chris Klimas."
[peanut-gallery] baf asks, "Is there a page listing all the nominees?"
Fang cheers.
Jacqueline applauds.
Eluchil applauds heartily.
[peanut-gallery] Thrax says, "http://www.xyzzynews.com/2004finalists.html"
zarf says, "Yay"
vbnz woo-hoo!
Paul says, "Hooray for these quotes"
maga says, "yay"
inky says, "woo apropos quote"
JoshuaH cheers.
lpsmith cheers
vbnz exclaims, "yipee!!"
[peanut-gallery] DorianX says, "Funk and Wagnals defines "excellence" as the state or quality of being excellent. The nominees are..."
Paul says, "Also hooray for Blue Chairs"
klimas laughs.
TheArtist says, "'To be, or not to be?' That is the question for Tomasz Pudlo in Gamlet, by Tomasz Pudlo."
Eluchil applauds loudy.
inky says, "ha ha"
TShatrov says, "yay chairs"
inky says, "I guess that was an easy one"
Fang applauds.
JoshuaH applauds.
vbnz laughs err... cheers
TheArtist says, "'With great power comes great responsibility' for Austin in Luminous Horizon, by Paul O'Brian."
Eluchil applauds sincerely.
klimas says, "yay"
<Trumgottist> Trumgottist has connected to ifMUD.
rrafgon cheers
Paul says, "Hee"
TShatrov says, "yay for trolls"
Jacqueline claps.
<Hugo> Hugo has connected to ifMUD.
Trumgottist walks out from under the archway south of here, although you didn't notice him approaching it from the other side.
ifdhan walks out from under the archway south of here, although you didn't notice it approaching it from the other side.
Eluchil exclaims, "Empress Emily was robbed!"
Jon says, "And with great responsibility comes great potential for punishment"
Hugo walks out from under the archway south of here, although you didn't notice him approaching it from the other side.
Bishop exclaims, "Yay great power!"
</Jaybird> 3. Many cash registers still put the DVD in the piggywig and ZIL is the Infocom language of the Z machine.
<Jaybird> The onion is really high up there. Ah, there's that dish! Come here, dishie! Woops, here I come tumbling down with the ones in the mountains''
TheArtist says, "Stephen Hawking said, 'God not only plays dice, He also sometimes throws the dice where they cannot be seen.' Our fourth nominee is Jarrett Duffy in Necrotic Drift, by Robb Sherwin."
inky says, "ha ha ha"
Jacqueline applauds.
klimas says, "woo"
inky says, "hooray"
Paul exclaims, "Hee hee hee. Yay ND!"
Ellison walks out from under the archway south of here, although you didn't notice him approaching it from the other side.
Marvin says, "Woo"
Eluchil applauds wildly.
Recchi laughs
maga says, "woo ND"
Ellison says, "woo"
Fang digs out some dice from indecent places.
[peanut-gallery] TShatrov says, "the lag is unbelievilable"
TheArtist says, "Steven Wright quipped, '"Did you sleep well?" "No, I made a couple of mistakes."' Our final nominee is Julia from Sting of the Wasp, by Jason Devlin."
inky says, "HA"
[peanut-gallery] Jota says, "I'm not noticing any."
zarf says, "heh"
Eluchil applauds politely.
reese cheers
Bishop says, "Hee hee."
inky claps.
[peanut-gallery] tilp asks, "lag what lag?"
Paul says, "These rule. Also, yay Sting"
Fang claps.
klimas applauds.
Jacqueline applauds for Julia, who rocks.
Tommy cheers loudly for Julia's sass, class and ass.
Rob claps
maga says, "yay"
[peanut-gallery] inky says (to Tommy), "hee hee"
TheArtist says, "And the winner for Best Individual PC is,.. (opens envelope)"
[peanut-gallery] Jacqueline says, "Me either, surprisingly."
Eluchil cheers for all the nominees
TheArtist removes a slip of paper and several revealing photographs.
Bishop exclaims, "Yay Julia!"
TheArtist says, "But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Julia is the winner."
Eluchil applauds wildly.
Rob claps!
rrafgon cheers
zarf claps much
klimas applauds!
maga exclaims, "woo!"
[peanut-gallery] Jota says, "Perhaps the Internet has inverted itself."
inky says, "yay"
Fang exclaims, "Yay!"
Jota claps.
Paul exclaims, "Woo Julia! Hooray Sting!"
BrenBarn says, "huzzah"
reese claps wildly
Kwi applauds!
K-Y claps
JoshuaH applauds.
Tommy exclaims, "Hooray!"
Jacqueline applauds. "Wonderful! Yay!"
lpsmith cheers!
Paul claps a lot.
klimas says, "yay Julia"
Jon says, "good work tha"
[peanut-gallery] Jota says, "So that only people on dial-up have speedy connections."
tilp says, "good-oh"
[peanut-gallery] Fang says, "Hmm. Surprised, but pleasantly so."
inky says, "not that I wish to condone her behavior, but she does it so well"
half says, "Hooray!"
[peanut-gallery] Ferret exclaims, "Yay!"
[peanut-gallery] Bishop asks, "Is Jason Devlin actually here?"
Recchi applauds
[peanut-gallery] Tommy says, ""Haven't seen him."
Gunther says, "that rocked"
[peanut-gallery] zarf says, "man, I really have to get jason's ifcomp prize out to him."
TheArtist asks, "Is Jason Devlin here?"
vbnz says, "sting was the game that won Individual PC? Rad. Good game."
Rob says, "he's busy sabotaging people and breaking into offices in order to manage to get here"
[peanut-gallery] JoshuaH says, "You might try looking in the cleaning closet..."
[peanut-gallery] Ferret says, "Oh dear."
[peanut-gallery] Jacqueline says, "Jason's pretty busy, I wouldn't be shocked if he didn't even know this was going on."
[peanut-gallery] K-Y says, "Already I'm feeling the effects of not playing the games"
[peanut-gallery] * Trumgottist has joined the channel.
[peanut-gallery] Tommy asks, "Is he still a student?"
[peanut-gallery] Jacqueline says, "Yes."
[peanut-gallery] TShatrov asks, "where is fake_Jason_Devlin?"
[peanut-gallery] Jacqueline says, "heh"
[peanut-gallery] two-star asks, "Nobody sends the finalists emails?"
[peanut-gallery] Bishop says (to Jacqueline), "Aw, that's sad."
Rob drops fake_Jason_Devlin.
[peanut-gallery] Jacqueline says, "Nope."
[peanut-gallery] Tommy says, "I'm not judging."
BrenBarn says, "here he is!"
TheArtist says, "I'll hold on to this on his behalf. And keep it with my other trophy. As Mae West said, 'Too much of a good thing is wonderful.'"
[peanut-gallery] Bishop says, "That he's busyh, that is, not that he's a student."
Jacqueline says, "Yay!"
Kwi cheers for fake_Jason_Devlin.
klimas says, "yay"
Eluchil applauds heartily.
TheArtist sits down.
Paul says, "YAY YAY YAY quotes"
vbnz cheers wildly