On March 28th, 2009, at 3:00 P.M. EDT, the XYZZY Awards Ceremony was held at ifMUD. Below is the transcript of the event, not including side-comments that those in attendance made on the #peanut-gallery channel. Should you wish to see those comments, a version with those comments is also available.

 

inky clambers back up on stage. "Right, then, our first award is of course 'Best use of medium.'"
olethros claps politely
Gunther says, "won for the tenth consecutive time by Madame Clairvoyance"
inky says, "Best Use of Medium is a good one to start with because it is fraught with controversy over what exactly it means"
olethros unfurls his 'STOP MEDIUM AWARDS' banner
inky says, "but that hasn't stopped this year's finalists:"
inky says, "Afflicted, by Doug Egan"
inky says, "Everybody Dies, by Jim Munroe (with spectacular timing)"
inky says, "Gun Mute, by C. E. J. Pacian"
JimMunroe walks out from under the archway south of here, although you didn't notice it approaching it from the other side.
olethros asks, "who is mr timing?"
maga claps
inky says, "The Moon Watch, by Paolo Maroncelli and Alessandro Peretti"
Taleslinger claps
inky says, "and Violet, by Jeremy Freese"
Guest2 claps
djfletch applauds
olethros claps repeatedly and mutters
DavidW cheers all the finalists.
Taleslinger says, "Oh my good, the tension"
Lucea claps
NamelessAdventurer arrives from backstage pushing an enormous crystal ball.
nm holds his own breath
jdouglass just keeps. on. clapping.
inky says (to NamelessAdventurer), "ha ha, very funny"
inky says, "...wait, the ball, it's glowing white!"
inky asks, "...numbers?"
inky says, "aha! I deduce the winner is ... The Moon Watch, by Paolo Maroncelli and Alessandro"
inky says, "Peretti!"
dougegan pushed a button, which caused an earthquake!
Gunther claps
DavidW says, "hooray!"
Lucea applauds
Jota applauds.
TJSay applauds
McMartin applauds
maga says, "wow, awesome"
olethros whistles, claps and makes strange animal noises
violet cheers
nm applauds
Ellison cheers
ParserGirl claps.
Taleslinger claps
Grocible says, "woo"
Guest2 claps
inky asks, "Paolo or Alessandro, are you here?"
djfletch claps
Taleslinger says, "Yay!"
Cornelius claps.
DavidW says, "Now we have to make spooky moon noises."
Taleslinger says, "Yay for games about clocks!"
Gunther asks (of DavidW), "mOoOoOoOoOn?"
DavidW says (to Gunther), "Close enough."
Taleslinger says, "eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee - Jupiter, 12 months later"
olethros curls up in his comfort blanket.
Gunther says (to Taleslinger), "astonishingly good approximation of the soundtrack"
JimMunroe claps
Taleslinger claps some more.
maga says, "your puny award is irrelevant to the march of world socialism"